(This article originally appeared in the TAU-USA Spring Issue #109)

by Kathleen Molaro, OFS

Franciscan Youth and Young Adult Commission Chair

The commission has spoken many times about the importance of creating youth-friendly fraternities. Why is this essential and what does this really mean? The simple answer to the first question is, it’s essential because if a young person is interested in joining a YouFra (Franciscan Youth Fraternity), at this point they have nowhere to go with that desire, except to us—the Secular Franciscans. There are only a few official YouFra groups in the United States.

Many individuals and fraternities, however, are taking steps to reach out to youth and young adults. So until there are enough young people to form a YouFra, they need us to welcome them into our fraternities! Our Rule calls us to include our younger generation and “adopt appropriate means for growth in Franciscan and ecclesial life and encourage everyone to a life of fraternity” (Art. 24).

What does it mean to have a youth-friendly fraternity? That question is a little complicated. We all know the best way to draw people to us is by being present and visible; by living our charism authentically and with great joy; and by truly making our fraternity life vibrant and inspirational. This is especially true if a young person crosses our path or even walks through the door to join a gathering. Our younger Catholics live in a dangerous and sometimes depressing world. Our call is to spread hope, and to encourage them to see the good, beautiful creation around them and to seek Jesus in every face they meet. Our willingness to serve and sacrifice to make things better speaks volumes. Phew. That’s a lot to ask, right? However, this is what we said “yes” to in our Profession Rite!

How do we build relationships with a different generation? We are an aging Order. Most of us at one time or another have expressed a wish that younger people would be joining us as Secular Franciscans. One of my Franciscan friends said recently, “I look around the table and the young people are missing.” I had to ask her, “When was the last time we invited them to a meal? Were they warmly welcomed? What did we serve? Most importantly, what was the conversation around the table?” Of course, she was metaphorically speaking of the

Eucharistic table, but we can use the same analogy when defining a youth-friendly fraternity. We can invite them to our “family meal.”

When was the last time you invited a young person to a meal?

Our gatherings or other Franciscan events are like a family meal, right? Many friendships are forged or strengthened over a meal. Have we considered inviting others, including young people, to join us?

How visible are we? Do others, in particular the young people in our midst, know we are Secular Franciscans, or what that means?

Were they warmly welcomed?

Did we make an effort to connect personally with them? (As we do at a family meal?) Listen to their story? Let them know we were glad they came and invite them back?

What did you serve?

Was the content of our gathering nutritious, delicious, well balanced, and enough for everyone? (Like a plate of food?) Would they want seconds or trust it would be good the next time too? Would they want to invite a friend to come along?

What was the conversation around the table?

Was our gathering inspiring and meaningful? (Think of a conversation around the dinner table at a family meal.) Did we allow open, non-judgmental sharing and invite all to have a chance to speak? Have we learned how to dialogue respectfully when difficult subjects arise? Did we emanate joy and show how much we care about one another?

We all know that wishing doesn’t just make something happen on its own. (I have often wished a family meal would just arrive automatically and that everyone would get along!) It takes creativity, determination, time, and initiative. Many fraternities around the country are setting goals in this area and really working to determine next steps.

We suggest you use this year’s NAFRA theme as inspiration and simply “listen, discern, and go forth.”

First, listen. Listen to the young people in your lives, and to one another in fraternity. Listen to the Holy Spirit. Is God calling your fraternity to have the courage and to take the time to reach out to our younger generations in some way? Remember—our mission isn’t to grow our fraternities. Our mission is to share the gospel. How does the Lord want us to participate in this mission?

Next, discern. Start looking, as individuals and as a fraternity. Who are the young people to whom you have access? Are there young people in your Church? Are there already existing programs for youth and young adults nearby? Is there a college, Catholic school, or a catechesis program that is open to guests or outside speakers? Discern what age group you would best serve and who in your fraternity would be willing to take this on.

Finally, go forth. Once you determine who your young people are, you can brainstorm ideas for ways to immerse yourselves—even if it’s only a few times a year—either into an already existing program as a support, or by planning an event of some kind that will give you the opportunity to mingle and build relationships with the younger generations.

Our Rule tells us in Article 24 that we are to foster communion among one another, especially with our youth and young adults, and it challenges us to “adopt appropriate means for growth in the Franciscan and ecclesial life.” The commission is here to help. We encourage you to keep on moving forward. The fruit of your labor may eventually lead to the growth of the Secular Franciscan Order… but even if it doesn’t, you can look back and know you’ve done what you were called to do. Enjoy your meal!

https://www.secularfranciscansusa.org/2023/07/17/youth-friendly-fraternities-like-a-family-meal/

(This article originally appeared in the TAU-USA Spring Issue #109)

Carolyn D. Townes, OFS

National Animator, Justice, Peace and Integrity of Creation

The priorities for the National Fraternity for the next three years are Vocations, Relationships, and Communications. All are incredibly important to who we are as Franciscans. At a brainstorming session at our recent in-person National Executive Council meeting in St. Louis, Missouri, I shared my thoughts on the three priorities: “We must build relationships with better communications in order to bring in vocations.”

As the National Animator for Justice, Peace and Integrity of Creation, I see many instances of broken relationships and a lack of communications, which will not lead to many vocations. This is not only with our Order, but with any religious order or community. If relationships are not built, nourished, and sustained, then we are merely a dying breed. As an outlier, I remain in this Order because of the beautiful relationships I have built and sustained over the past twenty plus years.

“A sense of community will make them joyful and ready to place

themselves on an equal basis with all people…” (OFS Rule, Art. 13)

One dictionary definition of relationship is the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected. Another definition states: “the way in which two or more people or groups regard and behave toward each other.” I love those words: regard and behave. These are two basic ingredients of building relationships, creating connections. How would you regard and behave towards your supervisor? Your pastor? Another person in authority? Respectfully, honoring the dignity of the person as you actively and deeply listen to them. You exercise kindness and a certain reverence, knowing they are a child of the Most High God – just as you are.

So, why are there so many broken relationships – so much disrespect and unkindness, with people who don’t want to listen to one another? The truth of the matter is we have forgotten who we are in the Lord. We have lost that sense of connection with one another because we have lost that connection with who we are in Christ. You cannot behave kindly and respectfully toward another if you are not kind and respectful to yourself. After the global pandemic, many of us have become isolationists. It is all about me, myself, and I. The “we” has either been demoted or removed completely. We serve a relational God, who created us to be in relationship with one another as well as with creation. We are never meant to be alone on the journey. Although Jesus spoke of the narrow path, it is wide enough for two; since he sent us out two by two.

We must remember that we are all broken souls on this journey towards holiness – broken by sin, broken by grief, broken by illness, broken by life’s challenges. I believe we are so focused on our brokenness that we have lost sight of our connectedness. Relationships are also about our state of being connected. We are all connected because we belong to a triune God who models that connectedness; thus, we belong to one another. It is in that state of belongingness that we live and move and have our being. Our beingness informs our belongingness. We belong to one another because we belong to the God who first called us into relationships. Let us build those relationships as we continue to build up the kingdom of God. “We are called to build a more fraternal and evangelical world so that the kingdom of God may be brought about more effectively” (OFS Rule, Art. 14).

https://www.secularfranciscansusa.org/2023/07/10/building-relationships-one-broken-soul-at-a-time/